Why solace is serene

So I've alluded to it but not detailed it.  I was in love.  Deeply.  I considered him a integral part of my life.  I included him in everything.  I should have noticed he never did the same to me.  So on Tuesday 12th April he phoned 3 hours before he was due to come round and see me.  And also weirdly just 2 hours after he'd sent me an email saying how much he cared and how he was looking forward to seeing me.  So back to the phone call.  I was driving.  He asked me if I was alone and if I would pull over to talk, but said it wouldn't take long.  He told me it was over.  He hung up.  Three days later he'd posted my keys through the door.  I phoned him.  He hung up.  I left it a week and tried to phone again, I explained I wasn't trying to make him change his mind, that I just wanted to understand.  He hung up.  So thats it.  Life's easier  just me and son.  I have more time.  Its calmer.  But I don't understand and I still miss him.

May - murky, marking and music

So we've made it to mid May.  May is my fvourite month of the year, its supposed to be great weather, carefree and the start of a jubilant, relaxed few months.  Its not quite working for me this year.  April stole May's weather.  Someone stole my boyfriend.  And the kids at school have done a load of tests that are now on my living room carpet waiting to be marked.  Hmmmm.  Maybe the May feeling might have to wait til late June this year.